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Mr. T, Joe Biden, and Other Celebrities Who Gave Us New Ways to Say "Bullshit"

Mother Jones

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While researching my new book Bullshit: A Lexicon, I came across hundreds of words that refer to bullshit or bullshitters. Most of these words—like most words in general—don’t have a definitive inventor. Word history is usually far too tangled to point to one person as the creator of a word. But a select few BS words, whatever their origin, have a Patron Saint: Someone highly associated with that word who pushed it to greater prominence and popularity.

Here’s a look at five people and the BS they spread.

Pete Marovich/ZUMAPress

Stephen Colbert: truthiness

While the word truthiness was not an original coinage of Colbert’s—it’s been around since at least the 1800s—Colbert launched it into the linguistic stratosphere when he used it in the first episode of The Colbert Report in 2005. Not only is truthiness commonly used, it’s inspired the Colbert suffix, which forms terms such as mathiness, an approach to math that doesn’t quite add up.

Olivier Douliery/UPPA via ZUMAPress

Joe Biden: malarkey

There are many reasons why some people would like to see Joe Biden run for President. For my money, I’d just like to hear the word malarkey more often. Biden has used the term several times, but his most memorable use was probably when he responded to Paul Ryan in an October 2012 debate: “With all due respect, that’s a bunch of malarkey.” The origin of malarkey is uncertain, but it does seem to share Irish roots with the vice president.

Globe Photos/ZUMAPress

Mr. T: jibber-jabber

Thanks to the huge success of The A-Team and Mr. T’s character B.A. Baracus in the ’80s, jibber-jabber (or ­jibba-jabba) became a very popular word that’s still associated with the fool-pitying actor. Jibber has been around since the 1800s, and jibber-jabber first started popping up in the early 1900s. The Oxford English Dictionary‘s first use is from Archibald Haddon’s 1922 book Green Room Gossip: “The jibber-jabber was entertaining, not because the utterances were those of ordinary human beings, but because they were the voice of George Bernard Shaw.”

Library of Congress

Warren Harding: bloviation

For a long time, Harding was considered the inventor of this wonderful, hot air-inspired word, but he was just the spreader of this Ohio-ism. Bloviation is a near-perfect word for bullshit, especially long-winded pretentious bullshit: it sounds like what it is. The verb form is bloviate, which is done by a bloviator. If any BS word deserves a comeback during this interminable election season, it’s this one.

Pete Marovich/ZUMAPress

Antonin Scalia: applesauce

Whatever you think of his politics, it can’t be denied that Supreme Court Justice Scalia has a way with words, especially old words with a folksy flavor. In addition to using jiggery-pokery—another word in the neighborhood of BS—Scalia used the expression “Pure applesauce” in a dissent back in June. Green’s Dictionary of Slang traces this use back to the late 1800s, mainly in exclamations. If only a debate moderator had the wit to pull a Scalia and reply to some truthiness with “Applesauce!”

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Mr. T, Joe Biden, and Other Celebrities Who Gave Us New Ways to Say "Bullshit"

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Parachute Drops, Cheerleaders, and Giant Flags: How the Pentagon Paid Pro Sports for PR

Mother Jones

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If you’ve been to a pro sports game recently, you’ve almost certainly seen tributes to the military, from unraveling giant American flags showing to photos and videos of servicemen and women on the Jumbotron. A new senate report by Arizona Senators John McCain and Jeff Flake, released yesterday, finds that many of these seemingly voluntary displays were in fact paid for by the Department of Defense. Between 2012 and 2015, the Pentagon paid sports teams $53 million for marketing and advertising, including at least $6.8 million for what the report dubs “paid patriotism.”

The senators obtained 122 Pentagon contracts with sports leagues and teams for what they described as “marketing gimmicks.” Among the top recipients of military money were NASCAR ($1.6 million over four years), the Atlanta Falcons ($879,000), the New England Patriots ($700,000), and the Buffallo Bills ($650,000).

Last year, the Pentagon spent millions on advertising with sports teams as it was simultaneously requesting funding from Congress to cover a $100 million budget shortfall to pay its troops, according to the report.

Here are a few team-specific promotional deals that stuck out in the 150-page report:

Charlotte Hornets: “One parachute drop-in” by an Air Force member at each home game
Dallas Mavericks: Letting the Texas Army National Guard “bring out their mechanical bull and/or rock wall for fans to enjoy”
Minnesota Wild: A color guard ceremony and letting a National Guard soldier “rappel from the catwalk to deliver the game puck”
Indianapolis Colts: “For use of a luxury suite, autographed items, pregame field visits and cheerleader appearances.”
Milwaukee Brewers: $49,000 to recognize the Wisconsin Army National Guard during performances of “God Bless America” at each Sunday home game
Atlanta Falcons: Recognition of the Army National Guard “birthday,” the opportunity for a National Guard soldier to perform the national anthem, and the opportunity for soldiers to “hold a large American flag on the field during a military appreciation game.”
Green Bay Packers: A “party deck” for 200 National Guard soldiers and their families
Minnesota Lynx: A military night featuring a “soldier rappelling from the arena catwalk while another soldier performed the national anthem”
NASCAR: A ride-along with Richard Petty and appearances with Petty and Aric Almirola.
Iron Dog: VIP passes to the Alaskan snowmobile race
Alamo City Comic Con: Admission for 20 soldiers and their family members. (We know, comic book conventions aren’t sporting events, but this is too weird not to include.)

The issue of paid patriotism first emerged this spring, when Sen. Flake questioned the military tributes at New York Jets games. Since then, the Pentagon has banned paying for these salutes to the troops, and the NFL has called on its teams to stop accepting payments for them.

According to a Pentagon memo included in the report, the department maintains that the advertising helped with recruiting, especially since youth “have grown less positive about the associations they make with military service.” Senators Flake and McCain counter that “If the most compelling message about military service we can deliver to prospective recruits and influencers is the promise of game tickets, gifts, and player appearances, we need to rethink our approach to how we are inspiring qualified men and women to military service.”

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Parachute Drops, Cheerleaders, and Giant Flags: How the Pentagon Paid Pro Sports for PR

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Woody Harrelson Answers “What Does Sustainability Mean To You?”

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Woody Harrelson Answers “What Does Sustainability Mean To You?”

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The Keystone XL Pipeline Isn’t Dead Yet. Here’s What You Need to Know About What Comes Next.

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The Keystone XL Pipeline Isn’t Dead Yet. Here’s What You Need to Know About What Comes Next.

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This Animated Video Scarily Shows How Humans Can Affect the Planet

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This Animated Video Scarily Shows How Humans Can Affect the Planet

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Why Recycled Polyester Fashion Is NOT Sustainable

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Why Recycled Polyester Fashion Is NOT Sustainable

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Contaminated Produce You Should Avoid This Season

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Contaminated Produce You Should Avoid This Season

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A DEA Agent Who Helped Take Down Silk Road Is Going to Prison for Unbelievable Corruption

Mother Jones

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A corrupt former drug enforcement agent who played a central role in taking down the popular online drug bazaar Silk Road will serve six and a half years in prison for corruption, a federal judge ruled Monday.

Carl Mark Force IV pleaded guilty to extortion, money laundering, and obstruction of justice this past summer, after working for two years as an undercover agent for an interagency team tasked with identifying the owner of Silk Road. Force, who spent 15 years with the Drug Enforcement Administration, used his position in the investigation to swindle his way to a payout of more $700,000 in Bitcoin and a Hollywood contract. (Another member of the investigative team, ex-Secret Service Agent Shaun Bridges, also pleaded guilty over the summer to pocketing $820,000 from the accounts of Silk Road users.) Force has also been ordered to pay $340,000 in restitution.

In case you haven’t been following the Silk Road case, here’s a primer:

What exactly was Silk Road, again? Silk Road was a darknet marketplace that connected buyers and sellers dealing in a vast array of narcotics, false documents, weapons, and other contraband. “The idea was to create a website where people could buy anything anonymously, with no trail whatsoever that could lead back to them,” creator Ross Ulbricht wrote in his journal. Users paid in Bitcoin—around $1.2 billion worth—and could only access the site using an anonymous internet browser called Tor. Ulbricht ran Silk Road using the moniker “Dread Pirate Roberts” from January 2011 until 2013, when he was caught red-handed at his laptop by a law enforcement sting in a San Francisco coffee shop.

Depending on whom you ask, the site was either a radical experiment in libertarian principles or “the most sophisticated and extensive criminal market on the Internet,” as the criminal complaint against Force put it.

Ulbricht, who earned a commission on each transaction, was found guilty of drug trafficking, money laundering, and hacking, and he was sentenced to life in prison during the summer. At the sentencing hearing, the federal judge didn’t hide her intention to make an example of Ulbricht: “What you did was unprecedented, and in breaking that ground as the first person you sit here as the defendant now today having to pay the consequences for that.” Ulbricht’s family, defense counsel, and supporters have mounted a public campaign to protest what they call a “draconian sentence.”

Okay, but what does Carl Force have to do with all that? As the lead undercover cop for a Baltimore-based team of federal investigators, Force was in charge of communicating with Ulbricht. To that end, he created and used a fake persona, “Nob”—ostensibly a US drug smuggler—to make contact and gain Ulbricht’s trust. In his communication with Nob, Ulbricht commissioned the murder of an employee, Curtis Green, whom he suspected of stealing Bitcoin from Silk Road accounts. (That money turned out to have been stolen by Bridges.) Force and the rest of the Baltimore team then staged the murder of Green. The incident was the first of six hits that Ulbricht has been accused of arranging, though those charges were not pursued in the final prosecution.

At what point did Force start breaking the law? In addition to Nob, Force created unauthorized personas, including “French Maid” and “Death from Above,” which he used to extort more than $200,000 from Ulbricht in exchange for fake identification and inside information on the federal investigation. Because many of the communications were encrypted, it’s impossible to tell whether the intelligence Force sold to Ulbricht was entirely junk, or whether he truly was a mole. What we do know is that once Ulbricht paid, Force has admitted to transferring the funds to a personal account, not a government one.

“Carl Force crossed the line from enforcing the law to breaking it,” Assistant Attorney General Leslie Caldwell said in a statement after Force’s guilty plea, adding that the agent was “seduced by the perceived anonymity of virtual currency and the dark web.”

That sounds like something straight out of The Shield. There’s more: Force, who has invested heavily in Bitcoin since learning of it through the case, became the acting chief compliance officer at the Bitcoin company CoinMKT in 2013. There, he illegally seized more than $300,000 in assets from a user that the company had flagged for suspicious activity and transferred the money to his personal account.

And to top it all off, in March 2014, Force entered into a $240,000 contract with 20th Century Fox Film Studios for a film about the Silk Road investigation—without notifying his superiors.

Could this affect a potential appeal by Ulbricht? Yup. His defense attorney, Joshua Dratel, has indicated that the appeal will challenge the decision to ban any reference to the corruption from the courtroom. “We knew that the case agent who made the first contact with Dread Pirate Roberts was, in fact, entirely corrupt,” Ulbricht’s lawyer said following the sentencing. “We were prevented from using any of that at trial. That is going to be an issue.” Dratel had previously called for a retrial after the corruption charges came to light, but the request was denied—in part because a second, concurrent investigative team based in New York was the one that ultimately busted Ulbricht, not the Baltimore team. The appeal, which has not yet been scheduled, will go before a panel of three judges in the 2nd Circuit Court of Appeals.

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A DEA Agent Who Helped Take Down Silk Road Is Going to Prison for Unbelievable Corruption

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